A CUTE LITTLE LOVE STORY

[retired2]

A CUTE LITTLE LOVE STORY

Little Bruce and Jenny are only 12 years old, but they know
they are in love.

One day they decide that they want to get married, so Bruce
goes to Jenny's father to ask him for her hand.

Bruce bravely walks up to him and says,
"Mr. Smith, me and Jenny are in love and I want to ask you for
her hand in marriage."

Thinking that this was just the cutest thing, Mr. Smith
replies, "Well Bruce, you are only 12.. Where will you two live?"

Without even taking a moment to think about it, Bruce replies,
"In Jenny's room. It's bigger than mine and we can both fit in there
nicely."

Mr. Smith says with a huge grin, "Okay, then how will you live?
You're not old enough to get a job. You'll need to support
Jenny."

Again, Bruce instantly replies, "Our allowance, Jenny makes
five bucks a week and I make 10 bucks a week.
That's about 60 bucks a month, so that should do us just fine."

Mr. Smith is impressed Bruce has put so much thought into this.
"Well Bruce, it seems like you have everything figured out. I
just have one more question. What will you do if the two of you should have
little children of your own?"



Bruce just shrugs his shoulders and says, "Well, we've been
lucky so far."

Mr. Smith no longer thinks the little shit is adorable!

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EVER SINCE I WAS A CHILD, I'VE ALWAYS HAD A FEAR OF
SOMEONE UNDER MY BED AT NIGHT. SO I WENT TO A SHRINK AND TOLD HIM:

'I've got problems. Every time I go to bed I think there's somebody
under it. I'm scared. I think I'm going crazy.'
'Just put yourself in my hands for one year,' said the shrink. 'Come talk to me three times a
week and we should be able to get rid of those fears.'
'How much do you charge?'
'Eighty dollars per visit,' replied the doctor.
'I'll sleep on it,' I said.
Six months later the doctor met me on the street. 'Why didn't you come to see me about
those fears you were having?' he asked.
'Well, Eighty bucks a visit three times a week for a year is an awful lot of money!
A bartender cured me for $10. I was so happy to have saved all that money that I went
and bought me a new pickup!'
'Is that so!' With a bit of an attitude he said, 'and how, may I ask, did a bartender cure you?'
'He told me to cut the legs off the bed! Ain't nobody under there now

[retired2]

Wine does not make you FAT .....

- it makes you LEAN .....
(Against tables, chairs, floors, walls and ugly people.)

[Ruby Tuesday]

Wine does not make you FAT .....

- it makes you LEAN .....
(Against tables, chairs, floors, walls and ugly people.)

I'm going to use that one ....

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