Anne Maynard, has sued St Luke’s hospital

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A recent article in the Kentucky Post reported that a woman, one Anne Maynard, has sued St Luke’s hospital,
saying that after her husband was treated there recently, he had lost all interest in sex.


A hospital spokesman replied, "Mr Maynard was actually admitted to Ophthalmology - all we did was correct his eyesight..."

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A polite way to call someone a bastard.




A GOOD STORY For those who enjoy golfing for enjoyment

A polite way to call someone a bastard.



A man was about to tee off on the first hole. A second golfer approached
and asked if he could join him.


The first man said that he usually played alone, but agreed to the
twosome.

They were even for the first few holes. The second man said, "Clearly,
we're about evenly matched, so how about playing for five bucks a hole?"


The first man said that he wasn't much for betting, but agreed to the terms.

The second golfer won the remaining sixteen holes with ease.

As they walked off after #18, the second man happily counted his $80 winnings.
Then he confessed that he was a pro at a neighboring course and that he
liked to pick on suckers.

The first golfer revealed that he was the parish priest.

The pro was flustered and apologetic; he offered to return the money.

The priest said, "You won fair and square: I was foolish to bet with you.
You keep your winnings."

The pro asked, "Is there anything I can do to make it up to you?"

The priest replied, "Well, you could come to Mass on Sunday and make a donation.
And if you bring your mother and father along, I'll marry them."

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Seniors Travel


A Travel Agent looked up from his desk to see an old lady and an old
gentleman peering in the shop window at the posters showing the glamorous
destinations around the world. The agent had a good week and the dejected
couple looking in the window gave him a rare feeling of generosity.

He called them into his shop, 'I know that on your pension you could
never hope to have a holiday, so I am sending you off to a
fabulous resort at my expense, and I won't take no for an answer.'

He took them inside and asked his secretary to write two flight
tickets and book a room in a five star hotel. Then, as can be
expected, they gladly accepted, and were off!

About a month later the little old lady came in to his shop. 'And
how did you like your holiday?' he asked eagerly.

'The flight was exciting and the room was lovely,' she said. 'I've
come to thank you, but one thing puzzled me.
Who was that old bugger I had to share the room with?

ACTUALLY, SOME OF US ASK THE SAME QUESTION EVERY MORNING....

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Dead Penguins - I never knew this!

Did you ever wonder why there are no dead penguins on the ice in Antarctica ? Where do they go?


It is a known fact that the penguin is a very ritualistic bird which lives an extremely ordered and complex life. The penguin is very committed to its family and will mate for life, as well as maintaining a form of compassionate contact with its offspring throughout its life.


If a penguin is found dead on the ice surface, other members of the family and social circle have been known to dig holes in the ice, using their vestigial wings and beaks, until the hole is deep enough for the dead bird to be rolled into, and buried.

The male penguins then gather in a circle around the fresh grave and sing:


"Freeze a jolly good fellow."
"Freeze a jolly good fellow."



It's so easy to fool OLD people.

Oh, quit whining. I fell for it, too

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