Lost in Nova Scotia.

[retired2]

Lost in Nova Scotia. 
 
Only a Canadian would get this: 
 
Two American tourists were driving through Nova Scotia.
As they were approaching Shubenacadde (shoe-been-ack-id-dee),  they started arguing about the pronunciation of the town's name.  They argued back and forth until they stopped for lunch.  As they stood at the counter, one tourist asked the blonde employee, 
"Before we order, could you please settle an argument for us? 
Would you please pronounce where we are... ver-r-ry  slo-o-owly?" 
The waitress leaned over the counter and says,
"Tiiimmmmm Hoorrrrttooonnns"

[retired2]

Pinocchio, Snow White & Superman







Pinocchio, Snow White and Superman are out for a stroll in town one day.

As they walk, they come across a sign:

"Beauty contest for the most beautiful woman in the world."

"I am entering," said Snow White.

After half an hour she comes out and they ask her,

"Well, how did you do?"

" First Place ," said Snow White.

They continue walking and they see a sign:

"Contest for the strongest man in the world."

"I'm entering," says Superman.

After half an hour he returns and they ask him,

"How did you make out?"

" First Place ," answers Superman. "Did you ever doubt?"

They continue walking when they see a sign:

"Contest! Who is the greatest liar in the world?"

Pinocchio says "this is mine."

Half an hour later, he returns with tears in his eyes.

"What happened?" they asked.

"Who the hell is Mike Duffy ?" asked Pinocchio.