Too much sex-----

[retired2]

Too much sex-----

I couldn't help but over-hear two guys in their mid-twenties while sitting at a bar.

One of the guys says to his buddy, "Man you look tired."
His buddy says, "Dude I'm exhausted. My girlfriend wants to have sex all the time,
morning, noon and several times a night. I just don't know what to do."

An older fellow who looked to be in his 60's or 70's was sitting a couple of stools down,
and also over-heard the conversation. He looked over at the two young men and with the
wisdom of his years said,

"Marry her. That'll put a stop to that shit!"

[retired2]

A man and woman were married for many years. Whenever there was a confrontation, yelling could be heard late into the night. The old man would shout, "When I die, I will dig my way up and out of the grave and come back and haunt you for the rest of your life!"

Neighbors feared him. The old man liked the fact that he was feared. Then one evening he died at the age of 98. After the burial, the woman's neighbors, concerned for her safety, asked, "Aren't you afraid that he may indeed be able to dig his way out of the grave and haunt you for the rest of your life?"
The wife said, "Let him dig. I had him buried upside down...and I know he won't ask for directions."

[retired2]

BIOLOGY EXAM

This is straight from Scotland. Students in an advanced Biology class were taking their mid-term exam. The last question was, “Name seven advantages of Mother's Milk”. The question was worth 70 points or none at all. One student, in particular, was hard put to think of seven advantages. However, he wrote:

1) It is perfect formula for the child.2) It provides immunity against several diseases.
3) It is always the right temperature.
4) It is inexpensive.
5) It bonds the child to mother, and vice versa.
6) It is always available as needed.
And then the student was stuck.
Finally, in desperation, just before the bell rang indicating the end of the test, he wrote:
7) It comes in two attractive containers and it's high enough off the ground where the cat can't get it.

He got an A.