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Post by retired2 Wed Feb 18, 2015 7:58 pm

Here’s Why Scottish Police Have The Greatest Sense Of Humour | Dumpest


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Subject: Here’s Why Scottish Police Have The Greatest Sense Of Humour

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http://dumpest.com/scottish-police-sense-of-humor/
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Post by retired2 Wed Feb 18, 2015 8:12 pm


A priest says to his friend, the rabbi, that he
has a perfect way of eating for free in real
nice restaurants.


"I simply go in at well past 9 in the evening;
eat several courses slowly; linger over coffee,
dessert, and a cigar. At about 2 am, as they
are cleaning up, I keep sitting there until
eventually a waiter comes up and asks me to
pay. Then I say, 'I've already paid my original
waiter, who has left for the night.' Because I
am a man of the cloth, the waiter takes my
word for it, and I just simply walk out the
front door as calm as ever."


The rabbi, clearly impressed says, "Let's try
it together this evening."


The priest agrees and books them into an
expensive, 5-Star Italian restaurant . They both
eat like kings and, just as before, right at 2 am,
they are both sitting quietly after enjoying
their very full meal. Sure enough, a waiter
comes over and hands the priest & the Rabbi
a bill and asks them to pay. The priest calmly
says: "I've already paid our original waiter
who has left for the evening."




And then the rabbi adds: "And we're still
waiting for the change!

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Post by retired2 Wed Feb 18, 2015 8:22 pm


How I lost my teeth!!!!

I was in the Texas Rose last night, at the bar waiting for a beer, when a butt-ugly, big old girl came up behind me, and slapped me on the butt.

She said, “Hey sexy, how about giving me your number.

I looked at her and said, “Do you have a pen?” She said, “I sure do."

I said, “Well, you better get back into it, before the farmer notices you’re missing.”

My dental surgery is on Monday.
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