The Importance of walking

[retired2]

The Importance of walking

Walking can add years to your life.
This might enable you at 85 years old
To spend an additional long period of time in a nursing
Home at $3,000 per month.

My grandpa started walking
Five miles a day when he was 60.
Now he's 97 years old
And we have no idea where the hell he is.
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I like long walks,
Especially when they are taken
By people who annoy me.


The only reason I would take up walking
Is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.
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I have to walk early in the morning,
Before my brain figures out what I'm doing...


Every time I hear the dirty word 'exercise',
I wash my mouth out with chocolate.


I do have flabby thighs,
But fortunately my stomach covers them.
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The advantage of exercising every day
Is so when you die, they'll say,
'Well, he looks good doesn't he.'

If you are going to try cross-country skiing,
Start with a small country.
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I know I got a lot of exercise
The last few years,......
Just getting over the hill.


We all get heavier as we get older,
Because there's a lot more information in our heads.
That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

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Every time I start thinking too much
About how I look,
I just find a pub with a Happy Hour
And by the time I leave,
I look just fine.

[growler]

they keep asking me to take a long walk off the short pier ?