Watch out for little old ladies

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Watch out for little old ladies Empty Watch out for little old ladies

Post by Gebo on Wed Feb 29, 2012 9:24 pm

A little old lady was walking down the street dragging two large plastic bin bags behind her. One of the bags was ripped and every once in a while a £20 fell out onto the pavement.
Noticing this, a policeman stopped her, and said, "Ma'am, there are £20 notes falling out of that bag."
"Oh, really? Darn it!" said the little old lady. "I'd better go back and see if I can find them.. Thanks for telling me officer."
Well, now, not so fast," said the cop. Where did you get all that money?
You didn't steal it, did you?"
"Oh, no, no", said the old lady. "You see, my back yard is right next to a Golf course. A lot of Golfers come and pee through a knot hole in my fence, right into my flower garden. It used to really tick me off. Kills the flowers, you know. Then I thought, 'why not make the best of it?
So, now, I stand behind the fence by the knot hole, real quiet, with my hedge clippers. Every time some guy sticks his thing through my fence, I surprise him, grab hold of it and say, 'O.K., mate! Give me £20, or off it comes.'
"Well, that seems only fair," said the cop, laughing. "OK. Good luck! Oh, by the way, what's in the other bag?"
"Not everybody pays."
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Post by observer on Wed Feb 29, 2012 9:29 pm

Sweet vengeance! lol!
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Post by kishgo on Wed Feb 29, 2012 10:19 pm

Now THAT'S funny!
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Post by retired2 on Wed Feb 29, 2012 10:48 pm

The Veterinarian

One Sunday, in counting the money in the weekly offering,
the pastor of a small church found a pink envelope containing $1,000. It happened again the next week!

The following Sunday, he watched as the offering was collected and saw an elderly woman put the distinctive pink envelope on the plate. This went on for weeks until the pastor, overcome by curiosity, approached her.


"Ma'am, I couldn't help but notice that you put $1,000 a week in the collection plate," he stated.

"Why, yes," she replied, "every week my son sends me money, and I give some of it to the church."



The pastor replied, "That's wonderful. But $1,000 is a lot; are you sure you can afford this? How much does he send you?"

The elderly woman answered, "$10,000 a week."

The pastor was amazed. "Your son is very successful; what does he do for a living?"

"He is a veterinarian," she answered.

"That's an honorable profession, but I had no idea they made that much money," the pastor said.. "Where does he practice?"

The woman answered proudly, "In Nevada ...
He has two cat houses, one in Las Vegas and one in Reno "

Watch out for little old ladies Att00020
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