LARRY MAY BECOME MY NEW FAVORITE

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Post by retired2 on Mon Apr 30, 2012 7:13 pm

LARRY MAY BECOME MY NEW FAVORITE!


A new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses. She started her class by saying, 'Everyone who thinks they're stupid, stand up!' After a few seconds, Little Larry stood up. The teacher said, 'Do you think you're stupid, Larry?' 'No, ma'am, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself!'

Larry watched, fascinated, as his mother smoothed cold cream on her face. 'Why do you do that, mommy?' he asked. 'To make myself beautiful,' said his mother, who then began removing the cream with a tissue. 'What's the matter, asked Larry 'Giving up?'


The math teacher saw that Larry wasn't paying attention in class. She called on him and said, 'Larry! What are 2 and 4 and 28 and 44?' Larry quickly replied, 'NBC, FOX, ESPN and the Cartoon Network!'

Larry's kindergarten class was on a field trip to their local police station where they saw pictures tacked to a bulletin board of the 10 most wanted criminals. One of the youngsters pointed to a picture and asked if it really was the photo of a wanted person. 'Yes,' said the policeman. 'The detectives want very badly to capture him.' Larry asked, ‘Why didn't you keep him when you took his picture?’

Little Larry attended a horse auction with his father. He watched as his father moved from horse to horse, running his hands up and down the horse's legs and rump, and chest. After a few minutes, Larry asked, 'Dad, why are you doing that?' His father replied, 'Because when I'm buying horses, I have to make sure that they are healthy and in good shape before I buy. Larry, looking worried, said, 'Dad, I think the UPS guy wants to buy Mom.'
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Post by kishgo on Mon Apr 30, 2012 7:32 pm

gotta love LL
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Post by retired2 on Mon Apr 30, 2012 8:38 pm

The Night Nurse
The more you think about this one, the funnier it gets.
Short & sweet, a good one.

A very tired nurse walks into a bank, totally exhausted after an 18-hour shift. Preparing to write a check, she pulls a rectal thermometer out of her purse and tries to write with it. When she realizes her mistake, she looks at the flabbergasted teller, and without missing a beat, she says:

“Well, that's great....that's just great..........some asshole's got my pen!”

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Post by retired2 on Mon Apr 30, 2012 9:55 pm

LARRY MAY BECOME MY NEW FAVORITE 42624310
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Post by retired2 on Mon Apr 30, 2012 9:56 pm

LARRY MAY BECOME MY NEW FAVORITE 57648610
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Post by retired2 on Mon Apr 30, 2012 9:56 pm

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Post by observer on Mon Apr 30, 2012 10:05 pm

I've seen that one as how the US views the rest of the world - so enjoyed seeing how we Canadians might view our country! LOL
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Post by retired2 on Mon Apr 30, 2012 10:13 pm

You should like this one ob.

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Post by observer on Mon Apr 30, 2012 10:26 pm

Looks right to me, retired! LOL
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Post by retired2 on Mon Apr 30, 2012 10:28 pm

Some for our Florida friends

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Post by retired2 on Mon Apr 30, 2012 10:29 pm

LARRY MAY BECOME MY NEW FAVORITE Florid11
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Post by retired2 on Mon Apr 30, 2012 10:29 pm

LARRY MAY BECOME MY NEW FAVORITE Florid12
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Post by retired2 on Mon Apr 30, 2012 10:30 pm

LARRY MAY BECOME MY NEW FAVORITE Florid13
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Post by observer on Mon Apr 30, 2012 10:31 pm

Too funny! - except, of course, it's YOUR reality! And then, you might as well have a chuckle anyway. Might be the only bright spot in the day!
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