Why do men die first?

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Why do men die first?

Post by retired2 on Fri May 01, 2015 7:51 pm

Why do men die first?
 

Why do men die first? This is a question that has gone unanswered for centuries, but, now we know. It requires a bit of explanation.

If you put a woman on a pedestal and try to protect her from the rat race, you're a male chauvinist.
If you stay home and do the housework, you're a pansy.
If you work too hard, there's never any time for her.
If you don't work enough, you're a good-for-nothing bum.
If she has a boring repetitive job with low pay, this is exploitation. If you have a boring repetitive job with low pay, you should get off your lazy behind and find something better.
If you get a promotion ahead of her, that is favouritism. If she gets a job ahead of you, its equal opportunity.

If you mention how nice she looks, its sexual harassment. If you keep quiet, its male indifference.
If you cry, you're a wimp. If you don't, you're an insensitive bugga.
If you make a decision without consulting her, you're a chauvinist. If she makes a decision without consulting you, she's a liberated woman.
If you ask her to do something she doesn't enjoy, that's domination. If SHE asks you, it's a favour.
If you appreciate the female form and sexy underwear, you're a pervert. If you don't, you're gay.

If you like a woman to shave her legs and keep in shape, you're sexist. If you don't, you're unromantic.
If you try to keep yourself in shape, you're vain. If you don't, you're a slob.
If you buy her flowers, you're after something. If you don't, you're not thoughtful.
If you're proud of your achievements, you're full of yourself. If you don't, you're not ambitious.
If she has a headache, she's tired. If you have a headache, you don't love her anymore.
If you want it too often, you're oversexed. If you don't, there must be someone else.

Why do men die first?

Because they want to!
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Re: Why do men die first?

Post by retired2 on Fri May 01, 2015 7:52 pm

Stamp Recall .. Canada Post

<Untitled attachment 00016.jpe>

Canada Post created a new stamp bearing a picture of Ontario's Premier Kathleen Wynne.

However, Ontario residents have complained that the stamp is not sticking to envelopes.

This situation enraged Premier Wynne, who demanded a full investigation. 
After a month of testing and spending $4.1 million, a special commission has presented 
[size=32]the following findings:[/size] 

1. The stamp is in perfect order. 

2. There is nothing wrong with the adhesive. 

3. 
Ontarian's, are spitting on the wrong side of the stamp.
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Re: Why do men die first?

Post by retired2 on Fri May 01, 2015 7:52 pm

BEYOND FACEBOOK
 


PRESENTLY, I AM TRYING TO MAKE FRIENDS OUTSIDE OF FACEBOOK WHILE APPLYING THE SAME PRINCIPLES.
 
THEREFORE EVERY DAY, I GO DOWN ON THE STREET AND TELL THE PASSERBY WHAT I HAVE EATEN, HOW I FEEL ,WHAT I HAVE DONE THE NIGHT BEFORE, AND WHAT I WILL DO AFTER, I GIVE THEM PICTURES OF MY WIFE, MY DAUGHTER, MY DOG AND ME GARDENING AND SPENDING TIME IN MY POOL.
 
I ALSO LISTEN TO THEIR CONVERSATIONS AND I TELL THEM I LOVE THEM.
 
AND IT WORKS : I ALREADY HAVE 3 PERSONS FOLLOWING ME : 2 POLICE OFFICERS AND A PSYCHIATRIST.
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Re: Why do men die first?

Post by observer on Fri May 01, 2015 9:33 pm

All cute - but don't know whether 2nd or 3rd is my favourite!
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Re: Why do men die first?

Post by retired2 on Fri May 01, 2015 10:35 pm

Like # 3 myself
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Re: Why do men die first?

Post by Rick Wisson on Sat May 02, 2015 7:18 am

3
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Re: Why do men die first?

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