Could it really happen?

[observer]

A little old lady , well into her eighties, slowly enters the front door of a sex shop.
Obviously very unstable on her feet, she wobbles the few feet across the store to the counter.
Finally arriving at the counter and grabbing it for support, stuttering she asks the sales clerk,
"Dooo youuuu have dilllldosss?"

The clerk, politely trying not to burst out laughing, replies, "Yes we do have dildos.
Actually we carry many different models."

The old woman then asks: "Doooo youuuu carrryy aaa pppinkk onnee,
tttenn inchessss lllong aaandd aabboutt ttwoo inchesss ththiickk...aaand rrunns by bbaatteries ?"

The clerk responds, "Yes we do.."



"Dddooo yyoouu kknnnooww hhhoww ttooo ttturrrnn iittt offff?"

[retired2]

Ole and da hooker

Ole was walking home late at night, through the park, and sees a woman in the shadows.

"Twenty dollars," she whispers.

He's never been with a hooker before, so he figures, "what the hell, it's only twenty bucks..."

So they hide in the bushes and are going at it for a minute when all of a sudden a light flashes on them.
It's a police officer. "What's going on here people?" asks the officer.

"I'm making luff to my wife," Ole answers indignantly.

"Oh, I'm sorry" says the cop. "I didn't know."

"Vell," Ole says, "I didn't either until you flashed that damn light in her face."